This is what it looks like when we CHOOSE BIG: |
Inspiration! Excitement! The thrill! That inner spark ping-ponging across the caverns of our heart space.
Our Epic retreat had come to a close, and that was the inner deliciousness happening when I decided to ride this week out in Peru.
Inka-licious indeed. I have the picture to prove it:
And guess what showed up when the dust settled, my retreat tribe off in a van of 15, en-windy-route to the airport, and I was left alone in a new, foreign city, risking time, money, convenience and loneliness?
FEAR.
The voice of:
What the f*** are you doing Margaret?
We all have that voice. Often it comes through our mind. Often it comes through our mind daily. And often it can come through the voices of “concerned” partners, parents, or even parties that should otherwise be minding their own darn business.
This week the courageous women with me had to face fear straight on, probably about a bajillion more percent than they expected to. And you know what? They made it. We made it.
Whether in the most intense peaks of shamanic ceremony or a pretty legit concern of: “I might fall off of Huanya Picchu today” — fear lurked around every corner, begging to be seen and alchemized to strength.
How we manage fear is the best indicator to how adventurous our life will be.
That seems a pretty simple observation, but it’s remarkable how little time we spend actually working with fear.
With our retreat group, we spent one afternoon identifying our fears, bringing them closer in + filling them with compassion, and then swiftly parking them (literally) in a tree, in their proper place: the background.
The key to fear is not to squash, push, cover or “do it anyway.” The key is to go back to that moment of inspiration. To remember why we are doing what we are doing.
And to surrender to the trust that our intuition does indeed know best. Surrender is embracing all, even fear.
…I knew to hold my fear close as I was left alone on a dusty South American road. I knew she’d come along for the ride, so I expected her to show.
Fear’s trying to protect me. But you know what she knows now? I got her. And I got this.
x
