what if we have the ORDER OF LIFE all wrong?

I was musing over a life decision with a bestie, and here’s what he texted me after our call:

“Life never comes in the packages we want. And it stands to reason: the packages we want are all stories we tell from our ego…”

He went on to add, “Every great thing that’s ever happened to me on the physical plane: sobriety, finding spirituality, finding a great job, moving to XX and growing up… none of that looked the way I wanted it too. None of it….

I know you know this. But sometimes it’s good to be reminded.”

It was good to be reminded.

So much of self-development these days is based on what we can GET. Of course we all desire things in life, but what if we have the order all wrong?

Action action ACTION is masculine, yang. Get it get it get it GETITGETITGETIT.

Regardless of whether we are a man or a woman, that will exhaust itself without its counterpart of yin to receive.

And this isn’t just for women, men too would do well to accept and open to surrender and vulnerability. I had someone just this week email and tell me how important vulnerability has been in recently transforming his life. Incredible.

Yet the feminine is designed to operate and lead from this place. And we haven’t been taught or told that. Most of the women I have known are so far to the masculine spectrum, they don’t even realize when they are leading from it. I didn’t. Because we have been conditioned to celebrate DOING over BEING.

That’s even how we are taught to intend: think about it: what’s the order? Dream it up, wish it, desire it and then LET IT GO. But that’s impossible. Because we just listed precisely what we want, we are inherently invested in it. How am I going to let go of what I just said I wanted?

What if we could just BE first? We have to be with what is here NOW first. THAT is the secret to magic.

Surrender THEN intention.
Acceptance THEN action.
Awareness THEN the needle move to shift.

Can’t we see that without the being, the acknowledgement first, we have no where to go? No matter how passionately we charge forth, if we are not doing so consciously and aware of the gray, dark area, life will constantly redirect us back to have a look. And that 2nd look, and 3rd and 4th does not get any less painful, my dear.

We are still using spiritual concepts in a patriarchal paradigm of: do this and you will get what you want. 
Rather than: be and all is coming. 

There’s a difference between dazzle and magic. Dazzle is much more marketable, but ultimately hollow. It’s old paradigm.

Magic is inherent within us and possible at every moment. But the way that we’re structured we don’t have direct access to it. We don’t look for magic in the package presented to us, we look for it in the bedazzled package of the future. 

It would only stand to reason that the feminine must surrender first, receive first.

Allow, open, accept, surrender, receive.

You know what’s impossible to have hand-in-hand with surrender? Struggle.

In DIVINE FEMME virtual, we spend an entire week on this and return to it, again and again:
Surender is the foundation.
Receiving is the foundation.
Magnetizing is the foundation.

Life is not meant to be gripped. Or manipulated. Or handled. We can feel it when someone is doing that to us. And how does that feel? Pretty sh**y, my love… right?

So why do we grip, manipulate and handle our own life? Because we haven’t been taught otherwise.

Because creating the new paradigm together means supporting each other in NOT looking perfect. Surrender can be raw, and messy. But ultimately, most true. Most easy. And most beautiful.

x